"Titanic" with Leonardo DeCaprio and Kate Winslet was all the rage and it was still playing in theaters on Valentines Day. Yes, this was our first date. Before our official date DH called me the night before and we talked for at least an hour getting to know each other. It was then that I learned that DH was not a member of my faith. This was tough for me but I felt strongly that I needed to give him a shot.
The movie was romantic. DH took me back home and provided banana splits for my mother, step-father and sister. I went back to college after the exciting weekend hoping to hear from him! Three weeks passed before I heard from him again. A long distance relationship began. Phone call conversations lasted for hours. Roommates became irritated with me for constantly using the dorm phone (cell phones were not even an option nor available to anyone who was not rich). My focus on my classroom studies began to slip and I was falling madly in love.
A clergy leader of my faith advised me to break things off with DH. He said that it would be much better for me to entertain marriage prospects of my own faith. I followed his advice and up to that point in my life, I had never been so heartbroken.
DH was very upset but after a week he continued to pursue me. There was a connection, an emotional connection that neither one of us could deny. We were drawn to each other like magnets. We spiked each others senses. We satisfied each other's emotional needs. We began to lean on each other for support and strength.
Shortly after re-establishing our relationship, I invited DH to go on a college weekend trip with me to the island of Catalina. My mother strongly disagreed when I hinted that this might happen so we did what every young couple does when a disapproving mother states her opinion: WE DID IT ANYWAY! and it was one of the most romantic trips I have ever been on. We rode horses up into the island, we rode golf carts down the streets, we visited the famous Casino and we went on a glass-bottom boat ride at night to see the nocturnal sea life below us.
When spring semester was over, I moved back home with my mother during summer break. Our romance blossomed into full bloom. DH proposed to me. Multiple times. I really struggled with the fact that he was not of my faith but I knew what a good person he was. I knew how happy he made me. I knew how happy we could be together as man and wife. I prayed all the time to find an answer to my internal struggle of the man I loved and the religion I loved. I prayed for the Lord's guidance as I made this large decision in my life. Finally after some deep discussions with my Heavenly Father above and after some deep discussions with DH, I accepted his proposal and couldn't be happier.
Wedding plans began and our first test of real stress hit us like lightening. Flowers were arranged, venues booked, photographers selected and invitations sent out. Just two weeks prior to our wedding we went to see the movie Ever After with Drew Barrymore. After the movie we went back to the car and I could tell something wasn't quite right with DH. It was then, after that movie in the theater parking lot, that DH frightened me for the first time. He told me that he didn't deserve me, that I deserved better than him, that he didn't know why I wanted to have anything to do with him. He then proposed in a very different way. He proposed that we call off the wedding. The first episode I had ever witnessed was happening in this moment. I did not recognize this as an episode at the time, but that is exactly what it was. I went into shock. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Nothing in our relationship even forewarned me of an event like this happening. I cried, I cried and I cried more.
DH's father spoke with me and I learned something about DH that I did not know up until this point: DH suffers from clinical depression and should be taking his Prozac medication. DH's father informed me that DH had stopped taking his Prozac because when he met me he felt so happy around me all the time that he didn't think he needed to take his medication any longer. DH honestly believed all these months while he and I were together that he was now better.
In that moment, I determined that I would always make DH happy. In that moment I believed that DH needed me and I needed DH. Come hell or high water we would get through these difficulties together. I insisted he continue to take his medication, which he did. Little did I know what was to come in my future.
The wedding was back on and was an amazing event. Only a small handful of wedding party individuals had any idea about the near call off just two weeks earlier.
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FASTFORWARD SIX YEARS
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DH is diagnosed with manic-depressive bipolar disorder. Yours truly crumbles in disbelief.
~Elizabeth~
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